Life. Moves. On.

"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life...it goes on."- Robert Frost

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Full CIRCLE Moments

Posted on June 18, 2019 at 7:45 PM Comments comments (0)


IN CONNECTION to my previous post on full circles ➡️ ⭕️ After going through a really challenging breakup, there was this guy. We met through mutual friends and though we were often around one another, it meant nothing at the time. The same week I was dumped, I realized I had an extra ticket to a Zac Brown Concert. I decided to ask this guy if he wanted to come with me as friends. He said yes. The chemistry was undeniable between us, but dating was so far from my thoughts at that time. I had just gone through hell. There was no way I’d open up to anyone again, or so I thought. Fast forward to a few weeks after, he asked me to consider taking him seriously in the dating matter. I panicked and said I think we should remain friends. He was really hurt and saddened, because he felt we had a strong bond. Fast forward to 4 years later... after 4 years of me staying single, working on myself, dating many weirdos, and reading a lot. My focus on healing during those 4 years had many ups and downs. I did things that seemed out of character, but later realized it was part of a journey to help me learn my worth and also, find what I not only wanted, but needed. 4 years after saying no to this guy, my best friend was getting married and made it clear that he was going to be my date. I didn’t really have an option. So, he was and that night, we shared our first kiss. We soon realized, the feelings never left. Ironically, 2 days later I left out of the country for 3 weeks. We texted each day and while at my family’s vacation home, while looking out at cows, feeling at peace, I had my aha moment- an epiphany. It was him all along. It was always him! He’s my full circle. I texted him, “When I come home, I want to give us a shot again.” Remember, your journey isn’t meant to look like everyone else’s. Have faith that it’s all part of a grand plan. #trusttheprocess

Full CIRCLE Moments.

Posted on June 18, 2019 at 7:45 PM Comments comments (0)



If you’ve been reading my writing throughout the years- you’d know my fascination with things coming full circle. I’ve always admired the idea of things making sense, that “aha” moment we all want so badly. If you’re unfamiliar, a full circle is “a series of developments that lead back to the original source, position, or situation or to a complete reversal of the original position.” My search for full circles were developed after reading a book by @thesinglewoman where she shared, “When life brings you full circle, pay attention. There’s a lesson there.” As a person that seeks answers, reasonings and justifications to why everything and anything had to happen, this quote resonated with me. �� ��‍♀️ Full Circles are a magical, awakening moment. We’re often told, “It’ll make sense why it had to happen one day.” When in pain, it’s very challenging to accept this truth. When you’re sad, all you want to feel is good, now. Waiting for that day, moment or time in your life seems so mundane when all you do is feel sadness, lost, and confused. Whether you’re going through a breakup, separation, divorce, job loss, trying to get pregnant, etc... as cliche as it sounds, I know it’ll make sense one day why you had to wait. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but someday... the stars will align and the puzzle will connect and you will look back and realize you had the pieces all along. The pieces, which are the experiences you’re going through that are needed to somehow, in the most abstract way, click and create YOUR destiny. The journey may not go as you’d like and it may feel so frustrating at times. Wondering when will be your chance, your moment. It can be a long road and it can feel lonely at times. You may feel like giving up at times, but I ask you to stay hopeful. Positive your time will come. Things will always come full circle. It’s just trusting that when it does, you’ll be ready to accept the lesson.


Do it for you.

Posted on June 18, 2019 at 7:45 PM Comments comments (0)


I hope whatever action you’re taking, whether it’s going to school, applying for a job, working out.... I hope it’s all for you. Maybe you’re doing it to support your family, for the dream house you want or to be able to travel more. That’s wonderful- pinpointing your dreams helps us see the bigger picture. However, I just hope that whatever your dream is, you remember you have to want it for yourself, first. Remember that the reason you’re doing it should be to make your life better... not to satisfy someone else’s idea or dream. Self-love is a process. �� That includes realizing your individual worth. Keep going.

Walk in Fire

Posted on June 13, 2019 at 10:50 AM Comments comments (1)

Life is a series of events working for you. That’s right... working for you. I know you may not feel that way right now or even think it, but try. For a long time, I played the victim to the things “happening to me.” Oh, yes. I allowed my happiness, well-being, mood, etc. to be based on one incident in my life. Realizing years later, that very incident I made so big, is now so little compared to who I am and where I am headed. When we’re in a rut, it’s normal to feel low, unhappy and unsatisfied. It’s easy to want to fix what we know than to try to attain something better for us. How you respond to events in your life will create a chemical response that affects food digestion, how you sleep, how you think, and how you feel about yourself.



Sometimes this blockage traps good things from entering. As many of you may know, I walked alone for four years after being in a relationship for four years. That path alone after only knowing one way to be are now some of the best four years I can look back at. At that time, the path was rocky, the water choppy, and me, a mess. But today, I’m so damn proud of that girl who walked through the fire and came out 100x the woman she was and today, I love that girl. I feel for that girl. If I think long enough of that girl, I ache for her. Because she didn’t know then what I’m telling you now which is that whatever you’re going through today, you’re going to be more than okay. You are fire, my dear and fire doesn’t let anything standing in its way bring them down. Keep going... keep believing in something greater than you and have faith, because you’re damn right you are worth it.

Growing Older

Posted on April 8, 2019 at 12:10 PM Comments comments (7)

One thing that I, you, we tend to be guilty of is shaming ourselves for turning a year older- especially women. You hear it all the time, “Don’t ask a woman her age.” But, why? Each year is something to celebrate and be proud of. I think the greatest reason we don’t celebrate is often because we associate age with accomplishments or lack thereof. “I want to be married, have kids, own a home, retire by, etc.” We put so much pressure on ourselves to achieve dreams, but the beauty of a dream is that there’s no expiration date on them. Remember, you’re allowed to reach your faith, calling, passion, meet your love, have children at the time destiny has for you. Maybe you have more to learn, more to see, and more to grow. Trust the timing of your life and let go and watch how many more things will come your way. Keep on keeping on and move forward with confidence and grace. It will come to you in due time. Promise. Chin up, Queen. You got this.


 

 

Clarity

Posted on April 8, 2019 at 12:10 PM Comments comments (0)

I once read somewhere, “Yeah, you’re attractive, but are you good for my mental health?”


 

That resonated with me because it is difficult to see toxicity in your life until you step back and remove yourself from the space, environment, person, or feeling causing it.

 

I recently sat down to reflect with a follower on her journey and where she’s been. She has been single for some time now and she feels that she has become so independent, fearing letting her walls down again- that she will never know true love. I disagreed, because I was once her.

 

I was once the woman who was unphased by words, gifts, and any form of expression that symbolized someone was interested in me. The greatest memory I have of when this occurred was roughly 3-4 years ago when I was surprised at work with a Valentine surprise- chocolate covered strawberries. Nothing. It did nothing for me. In fact, I gave them away to my colleagues and trashed the card that came with it.

 

That’s not what I was looking for and not what I wanted nor needed. After realizing I had pushed myself into a place where I could care less to find love is the moment where I found it. That’s right- I found a stronger, greater, and more than necessary kind of love when I was least expecting it.

 

This self-love was something I never knew, but it was the kind of love no one or no thing could ever bring me. That same self-love lead me to meeting my boyfriend, Steven. When our paths crossed in 2017, I was in a place that I had never been in before and that was knowing who I was, what I wanted, and more importantly, what my soul needed.

 

That’s the thing about giving yourself time to heal, time to grow, time to feel. You connect with your spirit and soul and realize that not all things entering it will fuel it, so be picky. The reality is that you’ll never really see how toxic someone is until you breathe fresher air. You’re beautiful, my dear. Allow yourself to heal... whatever that looks like for you.

Greener on your side

Posted on April 8, 2019 at 12:10 PM Comments comments (0)


"You may think the grass is greener on the other side, but if you take the time to water your own grass....it would be just as green." Learn to appreciate what you’ve got, compare less, and value what you’ve got more. In your relationships, personal development, and life... spend your energy focusing on your own side and you’ll soon realize you, too, can have a garden of wonders. 

Sea Breeze

Posted on April 1, 2019 at 12:35 PM Comments comments (0)


I received an email last week from a follower who was having trouble dating. Her problem wasn't that she couldn't find anyone, but that for the life of her, she couldn't let people in. After exchanging a few emails, I realized what could possibly be the "problem." She had her guard up. She'd been hurt before and after knowing what it felt like to be broken before, she was always careful to avoid coming close to it again. Instead of taking chances and risking drowning in love, she chose to stay near the shore... where the tides are low, “safe,” and she can feel the sand beneath her feet. I think that it's easy to stay close to what we know and that's why we tend to repeat our mistakes, no matter how we much try to avoid them. It's easier to play with what we know than to explore something new. She felt worried that she may have lost out on good people because of her fear of getting hurt. I could tell she may have been close to loving again before, but something always led her to slip it like grains of sand through her hands. I think it's okay to be a careful person, but not at the expense of growing. Heartache, experience, and lessons are merely stepping stones that shape us to who we are to become. A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing grows from there. You grow most in the times that you feel the least amount of comfort. Swim away from the shore, my dear. The world is out there and it’s big and it’s unpredictable, but life is beautiful and worth you trying again. Always give love a chance to win. #comfort #therapy #water

Looking Back.

Posted on April 1, 2019 at 12:35 PM Comments comments (0)



They say that, “Life has many ways of testing a person’s will, either by having NOTHING happen at all or by having EVERYTHING happen all at once.” It’s true; you don’t know how strong you are till being strong is your only option. Unfortunately, shitty people do shitty things. You can let a situation break you or choose to let it help you grow and rise above. The only way to move on from a hurtful situation without bitterness and anger is to understand why you felt what you did and why you no longer NEED to feel it. Over the years, I have realized how precious time and is how so many things such as people, past circumstances, and fear can rob us from blooming. Looking back, people have wronged me. Even when I was in my darkest days and felt incredibly sad, something told me to trust the journey and that meant chasing the little light at the end of the tunnel that was left. Sometimes it’s so damn hard to see, but you have to hold on for life to that little bit of hope left. Even if it’s a fraction of how you feel... hold on to it. I did and believed in things coming full-circle, because they always do. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but they will. When they do, the light at the end of the tunnel will never have been clear. You just have to keep moving forward until things in the rear view mirror no longer serve you. Live life in full bloom, my dear. Never stop growing.

Thank you, Next.

Posted on April 1, 2019 at 12:35 PM Comments comments (0)

Do you ever stop and wonder, “How the f*^k did I get through what I got through?” Surprisingly, most people don’t ask themselves that. I wish more did. I wish we stopped and looked back a bit more. Not because the past should be holding you down, but rather... the opposite. I’m not afraid of looking back on my past. I thrive off of it. I know what I’ve endured and why it has made me who I am today. I know that everything that’s ever happened to me, good or bad, was never to hurt me- but to allow me to stand tall today. I am who I am because of my past, but I’ll never allow myself to become a victim to it. I’ve battled sadness, self-doubt, fear, anxiety, comparison, defeat, and most of all, realizing I don’t have to be anyone but me. I was born in the U.S., but raised by immigrants and a lot of who I am is because of them. I was voted “Best all around” my senior year in high school- it caused more bad than good. I put unnecessary pressure on myself in thinking I had to maintain an “image” of what that meant in the eyes of others. I was in a long distance relationship that resulted in trying to save someone who didn’t want to be saved.




I had people I thought were “friends” teach me by taking advantage of my kindness what a real friend is. I’ve lost myself, found myself, and am constantly working on deciding what and who I want to be. But one thing that is different about the girl you see here today vs. the one say 5, 7 and even 10 years ago is that she’s proud of where she’s been, where I am, and where I am going and that has always been enough. No one is going to come and love you until you know that YOU, with all your flaws and fears and challenges are damn perfect. Own you, my love. Because at the end of the day, your voice is the loudest amongst any crowd. So, thank you to all those who’ve wronged me. I couldn’t have done it without you. Thank you, next.