Life. Moves. On.

"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life...it goes on."- Robert Frost

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Holding You Back

Posted on April 8, 2019 at 12:10 PM Comments comments (0)

DON'T LET THE HEART THAT DIDN'T LOVE YOU, KEEP YOU FROM THE ONE THAT WILL.



Very often, I receive messages from followers that somehow end with, “I am never going to love again.” This is typically a sentence followed by a long explanation of heartbreak, defeat and unfortunately, sadness. I always feel sad reading these, because I know what it feels like. That stinging pain associated with having your heart broken. You can’t eat, can’t sleep, and just don’t know what to do to make it go away. I’ve found that the pain is inevitable and the more you try to stop yourself from feeling the pain, the more it appears. Numbing from substance abuse (binge drinking, smoking, rebounding) only “helps” a bit until you’re confronted with the pain again. I think the only thing that helped me when I was in this pain was letting go and accepting that this is going to suck for a while, but not forever. Accepting that I won’t truly know when the pain will “stop.” Actually, you don’t really realize that moment in time. You don’t recall the day, the place, or the point in time that it does. You just wake up one day and realize, “Whoa, I’m not sure when this happened or how, but I’m ok. I’m not great, but I’m starting to feel like me again.” That’s the aha moment we all so desperately seek and want and when it occurs, it feels so damn good because being lost from your soul is confusing, scary and painful as it is. But the beauty is you’ll find a new you eventually. You won’t come out the same. You’ll come back better, stronger, wiser. More aware of what you want and need so that one day, the right one will be there for you and everything that occurred up till that point won’t result in sadness... instead, you’ll feel thankful for the pain because it brought you to this.

 

Trust the journey, my dear. It’ll come full-circle in due time. You got this

Long Distance Relationships

Posted on April 1, 2019 at 12:35 PM Comments comments (0)
I recently had an old friend and follower reach out to me in hopes of being heard regarding his current relationship which is long distance. For those of you who’ve been following me for several years, you’d know that I’ve been in a long distance relationship and were apart for a year. While I’m no expert when it comes to love, relationships and how to handle breakups- I can offer you my advice based on personal experiences and the experiences of my friends. From my own personal experience, I’d say that long distance is very, very hard. It’s the truth. It’s difficult to share experiences physically with someone when they cannot be there, but what’s harder is if there is no trust. What tends to happen is the person who’s away often begins to question you- out of natural fear. This tends to cause a shift in the dynamic of power between two people. When one person begins to feel a lack of equality in the relationship, a push-pull dynamic begins. This continues and continues until neither can no longer handle it. That’s the truth. I truly feel the only way this can be avoided is CLEAR communication prior to being apart of your goals in the relationship, the long term plan and an overall idea of what both partners need to feel good moving forward. Communication is essential but not only when apart... before. This important step is often forgotten and the excitement of loving one another is not enough to sustain the emotions of jealousy, fear, and not being able to relate when finally apart.

Looking Back.

Posted on April 1, 2019 at 12:35 PM Comments comments (0)



They say that, “Life has many ways of testing a person’s will, either by having NOTHING happen at all or by having EVERYTHING happen all at once.” It’s true; you don’t know how strong you are till being strong is your only option. Unfortunately, shitty people do shitty things. You can let a situation break you or choose to let it help you grow and rise above. The only way to move on from a hurtful situation without bitterness and anger is to understand why you felt what you did and why you no longer NEED to feel it. Over the years, I have realized how precious time and is how so many things such as people, past circumstances, and fear can rob us from blooming. Looking back, people have wronged me. Even when I was in my darkest days and felt incredibly sad, something told me to trust the journey and that meant chasing the little light at the end of the tunnel that was left. Sometimes it’s so damn hard to see, but you have to hold on for life to that little bit of hope left. Even if it’s a fraction of how you feel... hold on to it. I did and believed in things coming full-circle, because they always do. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but they will. When they do, the light at the end of the tunnel will never have been clear. You just have to keep moving forward until things in the rear view mirror no longer serve you. Live life in full bloom, my dear. Never stop growing.

Long Distance

Posted on March 26, 2019 at 1:45 PM Comments comments (0)

I recently had an old friend and follower reach out to me in hopes of being heard regarding his current relationship which is long distance. For those of you who’ve been following me for several years, you’d know that I’ve been in a long distance relationship and were apart for a year. While I’m no expert when it comes to love, relationships and how to handle breakups- I can offer you my advice based on personal experiences and the experiences of my friends. From my own personal experience, I’d say that long distance is very, very hard. It’s the truth. It’s difficult to share experiences physically with someone when they cannot be there, but what’s harder is if there is no trust. What tends to happen is the person who’s away often begins to question you- out of natural fear. This tends to cause a shift in the dynamic of power between two people. When one person begins to feel a lack of equality in the relationship, a push-pull dynamic begins. This continues and continues until neither can no longer handle it. That’s the truth. I truly feel the only way this can be avoided is CLEAR communication prior to being apart of your goals in the relationship, the long term plan and an overall idea of what both partners need to feel good moving forward. Communication is essential but not only when apart... before. This important step is often forgotten and the excitement of loving one another is not enough to sustain the emotions of jealousy, fear, and not being able to relate when finally apart. #communication

Can't Half-Ass Love

Posted on February 11, 2019 at 11:25 AM Comments comments (0)

I read somewhere yesterday, “Does true love still exist?” Love is something that will always be self-defined and we all see it differently. No two people will view, understand, see, hear, or feel love the same. As beautiful as that it, I think it is also what causes many problems. Realizing that not everyone will accept your kind of love or that they’ll show appreciation of it how you’d like is an important piece of the puzzle. We’re not made to love the same and if we realize this, we will be better off. But, to me, love is the idea of accepting, wanting, caring, and desiring someone without condition. This is knowing that at any point in time, things may change but rather than fear this- you put your heart on the line and give it your all. You can’t half-ass love and that’s the only truth I’ve come to know.

Keep it Up.

Posted on February 8, 2019 at 11:25 AM Comments comments (0)



I’m not the type of person that really cringes when she sees old pictures of herself in the past. It actually makes me happy to realize in just a few short years, how much we, things, life can change. I went to bed last night listening to a meditation that reminded me that nothing in life is permanent and things can change in a blink of an eye. This is so important to remember when going through a tough time. Remembering that this too, shall past. A couple days ago, my boyfriend and I were going through my old photos I’ve taken in the month of February- laughing, especially pictures of me as a blonde. This picture popped up and I shared with him a little about what the picture was and together we laughed and continued looking at others. This photo was taken on February 8, 2015- just 4 years ago from today. On paper, it sounds not too long ago but in perspective and realization of who I was then, it’s a lifetime for me. You see, this photo is of me and a guy my friends basically set me up with. On paper, he had all the things I’d consider “good.” He had a career as a chiropractor, he made me feel beautiful, and desired. He even delivered Valentine’s Day strawberries to my office. Despite all these things that would make a girl feel ecstatic to pursue this possibility, it didn’t for me. Because these things aren’t enough to make relationships last and I learned that not long before this. I wasn’t ready to date, but I also knew that all this would do for me was kill time and take away from what I really needed to focus on and that was me, myself and I. This didn’t last long. Maybe 2 months max and got as far as a kiss on the cheek. I don’t like to drag things on when I know in my heart it’s not for me. Exactly 14 days after, on the next photo, is me- alone, happy and helping kids run at the beach. The reality of growth is that you’re never done. It’s indefinite and you keep learning and becoming different versions of you and my hope is that whether you’re on this chapter now, you remember that all good things come with time. Don’t be afraid to give up the mundane for something greater- and that may just simply be you, smiling, alone.


Many moons ago

Posted on January 17, 2019 at 2:20 AM Comments comments (0)

Many moons ago, it was difficult for me to travel. My body would respond with anxiety, stress, and fear. This resulted in never feeling good about going or being there. What should have always felt like a “vacation,” simply was work. It wasn’t until I realized it was never the trips that caused this feeling, rather the people I was going on them with to cause me to feel this way. I never felt for the lack of a better word, safe. It’s easy to have ptsd after bad experiences, like the fear of dating or even falling in love again after having your heart broken. You build walls so high to protect yourself that you don’t know how they’ll ever be broken down. It’s not overnight, but in the midst of all the bricks you build you’ll realize that you’ve got nothing to lose and that simple realization is what frees you from the fear. The beauty of life is that sometimes it brings you full CIRCLE to a place you have been before just to show you how much you have grown. No matter how many "how we met" stories I hear, or how many love stories get written, ours will always be one of my favorites... simply for the reason that my heart was hidden behind a wall only a real man could climb. Find someone who looks at you like you are magic & knows you’re worth the wait.

How do I become happy?

Posted on January 17, 2019 at 2:20 AM Comments comments (0)


One of the most common questions I am asked through email or DM on my blog, @lifemoveson21 is, “������ ���� �� ������������ ����������?” If we only knew how many people are struggling with finding joy within themselves, I think we’d all be more compassionate toward others. We wouldn’t preconceive people- remembering everyone is struggling a battle no one knows about. The truth is, everyone is trying to make it. Making your happiness and personal growth a priority in your life is often thought to be selfish. However, it allows you to take care of �������� ������������ in the long run. Knowing how to do that is tricky. Part of it is learning to transmit positive energy, words of kindness, and faith in yourself after experiencing all the things that have tried to weigh you down. For me, one of the greatest journeys I went on was challenging myself to understand my past. I did this through therapy and writing a book. I wanted to understand my heart and that meant stripping it down to the core to really know who I am, but more importantly... who I wanted to become. At one point in my life, I became very cynical towards the idea of love. I felt it wasn’t for me because I didn’t want to deal with the repercussions of having my heart broken again. By the way, I’m not only referring to a love figure. I grew up with strong negativity from my dad and his words were always harsh on me. I’ve learned to forgive him with the help of therapy, but to say they didn’t affect me for a long time is a lie. For the record, having a boyfriend is not solely the reason why I’m happy. Sure, being with a wonderful man has brought me more smiles and laughter... but he and I both know, when we were ready to be together, I was already in a place of happiness. I worked hard to find a “me” that I loved and no one can take that from you. Happiness is a very personal thing, my dear, and has nothing to do with others. When you realize you’ve given others that power, �������� ���� ��������.Your health, your peace, your smile are worth it. You come first. Everything else, like dancing in the snow with your loved one is just icing on the cake. I hope this helps anyone trying to find self-love today. 

 

It takes 2.

Posted on December 27, 2018 at 2:20 AM Comments comments (0)

"ONCE YOU'RE IN A RELATIONSHIP YOU THINK IT'S GOING TO LAST FOREVER.

BUT IN REALITY, IT ONLY LASTS AS LONG AS YOU'RE WORKING FOR IT.

IF ONE OF YOU STOPS WORKING, IT FALLS APART."


No I in team. Two people need to contribute. Two people need to care. Two people need to respect one another. Two people need to want it. That’s the only way it’ll work, that’s the only way it’s always been. The minute one side carries the weight to two is often when unhappiness begins. Help your partner. Love your partner. Speak to your partner. Listen to your partner. Always ask how you can be of more help, how you can be more loving, nurturing, etc. Ask, Speak, Communicate.... over and over and over again.

Actions speak louder than words.

Posted on December 27, 2018 at 2:20 AM Comments comments (0)

Life is too short to allow anything or anything who disrespect you and take advantage of your kindness. Always remember you have a choice: to sit in pain or to walk away. You always have the choice to leave when respect is not being given. Whether it’s someone talking down to you, ignoring you, or calling you hurtful names- you have a choice. I’ve always said you can tell how much a person cares by how much they’re willing to keep trying and showing effort. Actions speak far louder than words so trust when words are only followed by action. That means, knowing when enough is enough and what’s not worth fighting for.