|Posted on July 18, 2018 at 2:10 AM|
I'm not an easy person to impress- never have been. I think this is particularly do to my uncle treating me like a princess growing up. When I say princess, I don't mean spoiling me. I mean opening doors, complimenting me, remembering special dates and making me feel safe. He would always say, "You're so sweet, but you're a tough cookie." It's true. I often hear from people, "I wouldn't want to see you mad." Not because I'm an angry person, but because I'm a happy person. I have a lot of patience for some things, but I also have none for bullshit. I used to be a pushover and just take things thrown my way, but not anymore. I haven't been that way for some time now. I stopped living for others and that made all the difference. The other day, a follower asked, "What does perfect look like to you?" Truth be told, there's no such thing as perfect. We all know this. But the closest type of character that defines this that I can think of is sung by Dierk Bentley. The song is called, "Riser." In the song, he sings he's a fighter, "mean enough to stare your demons down." I love that. I've put a LOT of walls up- after being fucked over from others, this tends to happen. You do anything to protect yourself, your soul. As much of an open book I am, those who truly know me, know there’s so much more to me than what people see. As loving as I am, I am also stubborn so I really need someone who's able to put me in my place, because sometimes I need it. We all do. Someone who's not going to give up on us, who'll continue to try and who's a "trier." Listen to the song. Figure out what you kind of companion you need. Be that. Stand tall, alone. When you do that, the right people for you will break down your walls... no matter how fucking high they are. Don't settle.